So, about 2 weeks ago, my sister decided to divorce her husband. Totally deserved - he's treated her like a maid and a meal ticket for their whole marriage.
Their son's bday party is tomorrow at my parents' house. I am assuming the STBex and his whole family will be coming. Joy.
I hope it goes well. It really irks me people thinks that the best moment to "fix" or talk about family issues is at family gatherings. It's like they need everyone to watch the downfall.
I have no idea if my BiL has even told his folks. It wouldn't surprise me either way. The only thing that would surprise me is if he handled it like a mature adult.
She's staying here for the weekend, and letting him stay in "their" (actually, her) house. So he tells her that it took him 10 years to ruin this, and he'll spend the next 10 making it up to her. Meanwhile...the house is still a disaster, the laundry is still piled up, and he still hasn't hung the closet door in the baby's room - the "baby" turns 3 this weekend. Oh, and there's a hole in the wall of the baby's room where said closet door fell and punched a hole.
I plan to "accidentally" cut off BiL and his family's heads in all photos I take. Petty?
My sister says, "They won't care as long as A and B are in the photos." A and B are BiL's kids from his first marriage. I'm totally going to cut their heads off too. Not my job to provide pics of kids that AREN'T related to me. Take your own goddamn pictures!
As of 9 am this morning, BiL had NOT told his family. So they'll be showing up with no idea what's going on. Fabulous. (Mental note: clear computer history.)
Update: No major drama. It was interesting watching nobody from my family speak directly to BiL, and speak very minimally to his family members (mother, sister). Only 6 non-family folks came (2 kids and their parents).
As of this morning, BiL has still not told his family - including his two older boys from his first marriage. The older of those two (15) lives with my BiL and sister, so he'll be moving and changing schools in the next two weeks or so and STILL hasn't been told. An old friend of my mom's is in town, and we're having a nice family dinner and BiL is mad that his 2 kids aren't invited. He's mad that this "coming out of nowhere" for the boys. ANd he's mad that my sister didn't go with him to his parents' yesterday to watch football. Basically, he's mad that she's not playing "happy families," and that she is making it awkward for him to continue the lies.
At the bday party yesterday, everybody but his mom, his sister, his 2 older sons knew about the impending divorce. Lovely.
I don't think there will be a "slip up" b/c his family has no contact with the people "in the know". Possibly somebody will post something on FB. Nobody in my family, b/c we aren't big FB users, and what we post is strictly for public consumption, not private, embarrassing stuff.
He had to leave the room b/c one of his sons asked for Sister and he was crying...but he still didn't tell them the truth. B/c that's such a "hard conversation".
a few weeks ago, right before this started, his mother had a birthday party for all of the September birthdays. So, BiL (her son), Stepson 11 and my nephew. My nephew is her bio grandson as well. Sister specifically asked BiL if this was a party for all of them, and he says yes. Well, they get there...there is a present and card for BiL and for SS11. ANd their names are on the cake. Nephew is not included. ANd he just doesn't get what the "big deal is." It's totally okay for his mother to snub and exclude his BIOLOGICAL son, but it's not okay for us to not include his sons in this dinner. I misspoke earlier. IT's actually a bday dinner. Originally it was going to be a group bday dinner, but now it's just for our family.
I'm mad for your nephew. That grandma is playing favorites and that's wrong! The thing about him taking 10 years to fix what he did wrong sounds like a deadline for a procrastinator, given the chance, he would take the full 10 years to put the darn door in it's place. He annoys me and I don't even know him.
My sister has agreed to let him stay until the end of October to give him time to get a job, find a place, save up a deposit, etc. They are switching weekends at the house - the weekends he has custody of his other 2 boys, she comes and stays here and lets him and the 3 boys use the house. This is her weekend.
Apparently he STILL hasn't told his family, because this weekend he is staying in a tent. It's raining this weekend, so he called and asked her if he could stay at the house tonight b/c his tent was leaking. She informed him he'd had a month to find a job waiting tables or tending bar and then he'd have money for a hotel for 2 nights, or even money for a deposit on a new place.
I can't help but wonder what his point is in all this. What does he hope to gain by his behavior? Does he think ignoring it all will make it go away?
Probably. He told my sister that he'd been a sniper in the Army. Turns out he flunked out of basic training. He's so busy spinning stories to make himself look/feel good that he's totally oblivious to reality.