Yes, same Cousin as my other thread. But this needed it's own thread.
Cousin is a pediatrician. Over the summer, she participated in a program where she went to a country in South America for a month and treated underpriveleged people. Apparently her hospital has a sort of "sister hospital" there and they do an exchange program. While there, she met a cute surgeon and fell madly in love. She talked about him incessantly when he came home.
He came for a visit. I said, "Would you like me to make a special dinner?" "No, we're going out to dinner with my friends." Yup. Her "friends" got to meet her boyfriend the first night he was in town.
So they went to dinner with her friends, then drove to my parents' lake house where (I assume) they screwed like bunnies for two days, then drove back and he got on a plane to fly home. Yes, he flew to another HEMISPHERE for a booty call. Never introduced us to him. He didn't bother to send a thank you card, a gift, or even just say thanks.
She talks to this guy ALL THE TIME and about him ALL THE TIME. Like a high schooler with a crush.
They decide to meet up in New York to have a fun weekend. We are in Alabama, so she gives him her CC number to book her flight. (I have no idea why.) That trip ends up getting cancelled b/c he has to work. If you're a big-shot surgeon and regularly bee-bop all over the Western Hemisphere, and you know that your schedule is liable to change, woudln't you pay for your SO's plane ticket yourself?
So they don't make the trip - but he does use her CC to order a bunch of Gas-Ex off of Amazon and have it delivered to our house. Because it's for his sister and it's much cheaper that way.
So he's having PACKAGES delivered and he has yet to even say, "Hello" to the homeowners.
So one day I walk down there to do laundry and a total stranger is sitting in her couch and says, "Hey." I about jumped out of my skin. Good think I wasn't in my t-shirt and underwear. This guy had SPENT THE NIGHT in our house and none of us knew he was there. Cousin insists that at this point she "introduced us". At most she said, "Hey, this is BF" as they were walking out the door to go meet with her friends.
At one point mom did meet him - only b/c she was home cleaning when they stopped in to pick up some things. No, "Thanks for having me" or "Thanks for letting us use your lake house."
She decides to go visit her family in Florida for Thanksgiving. Mom overhears her on the phone with BF and she says, "Yeah, I'm pretty much a Thanksgiving orphan." She has attended Tgiving with us at my dad's sister's house for years and has always been welcomed and treated warmly.
As they are packing to leave, CS tells me, "The worst part of this trip is going to be BF." I scold him and tell him to be nice and be polite. (I'm noticing a pattern of BF sponging off of Cousin's family members.)
Well, they get back from their trip. According to Cousin, it went great. BF must not have agreed b/c he didn't return her calls or emails for a week. She panics and starts sending their mutual FB friends messages. Finally he calls her and makes some BS excuse about this whole LD thing being too hard, and he might be moving to Europe in teh next year, blah blah. (BTW, this is the 2nd BF that dumped her right after a trip with her son. Coincidence?) They half-ass "patch things up" - enough that she spends a long time on Skype with him on Christmas and ignoring her son while he runs amok. but they seem to be permenantly over now.
LOL mom said the same thing. CS's father would not have allowed that, but I suppose he could have gotten custody and then she could have moved.
I think what's going to happen is that CS's father is going to eventually find some woman willing to put up with him for his $. Seriously, this guy is such an ass that he was fired from a practice for being rude to the nurses. As I understand it, in a hospital, doctors are often very rude to nurses so this must have been AWFUL if he got fired for it.
Anyway, I think eventually he will find a gold digger, and she's going to get knocked up ASAP. and then she'll start trying to limit CS's visits, b/c CS is so obnoxious. And so Dad will have a new wife and a cute new baby and he'll gradually vanish from CS's life.
Meanwhile, Cousin will never have a relationship of more than a year b/c guys are going to run after spending a few hours with CS, and she'll get very little CS free time b/c Dad will not be exercising his visitation. And she'll get even angrier.
She once confessed to my mom that she resents how much CS cost her - she had to give up a residency in another state she really wanted b/c the Dad wouldn't let her take CS with her. Well, DUH. You're shocked that your ex doesn't want you to move 12 hours away with his kid?
I would not send a thank you note to someone I never met for using a cabin. Just because it would seem odd sending it to someone I don't know. I would put that more on your cousin to send your mother a thank you note for letting her use it. Maybe the same for letting her boyfriend stay over type thing. Kinda like I expect DH to send the TY notes to HIS side of the family because they are HIS family. Not mine. I handle the ones to mine. If that makes sense.
The whole sending packages to her house is odd as heck and would make me nervous that it was something illegal or something. She is also stupid as hell for giving out her CC number to this guy she barely knows. I don't know HOW your cousin graduated Medical school because she is dumb as ****. Reminds me of my SIL who is a nurse practitioner but is also about as sensible as a bag of rocks.
I do feel sorry for that child. As obnoxious as he may be, it can't really be all blamed on him. Children can sense things and he more than likely feels his mother's resentment. Why oh why do people bring children in the world only to emotionally neglect them? It's scary, I mean really scary that she is a pediatrician.
Iluv, I agree it can't all be blamed on him. I do lay most of at his mother's feet. However, he's been living with us with 3.5 years. He's had our good example, our corrections, etc. So at this point he is actively choosing to be a jerk. I do feel kind of sorry for him, but it's a distant sort of feeling. I'm so sick of him I just want him to GO AWAY.
Some kids are just unlikeable. I do not meet very many kids I just don't like. I pretty much love most of the ones I know and I know a lot of kids. But every blue moon I find a kid I just can't deal with. And usually it is because of how they are parented and raised.
