Cousin's Son (CS) has again resorted to fake nausea and throwing up when forced to eat food he doesn't want. He used to do this fairly frequently at about age 4 (he's now 8.5), until one day Cousin justed handed him a towel and said, 'Clean it up' then ignored him.
In order to appease the little beast and get him to eat regularly, Cousin takes him with her to the grocery store and they pick out everything together. And yet, they're still having mealtime fights! It's almost like it's not actually about the food! *gasp*
Last Monday, they were having leftover pizza. CS, like most kids, loves pizza. But that night, he wanted pasta, not pizza. So he starts whining about pizza, demanding to know why his mom didn't make him pasta. He works himself up and ends up throwing up in the bathroom.
Last night, it was sausage for dinner. Again, something he likes. Again, drama, whining, crying, loud hysterical sobbing. Cousin gets up goes back downstairs. CS sits there sobbing dramatically - then he opens the kitchen window and hangs out the window to throw up! Mom tells him to get back inside. Then he goes to throw up in the trashcan, and mom tells him not to do that. So he throws up all over the kitchen floor. Mom hands CS a towel, tells Cousin that CS threw up, and then Mom and I leave the area. More crying and drama as (I assume) Cousin makes CS clean up.
So Cousin and CS managed to take up the kitchen with their drama for 2.5 hours. By the time they finally cleared out, I no longer felt like cooking, so I heated up some leftovers for Dad and mom and I had some fried eggs.
He really is. At this point, it's really really hard for me to look past his behavior to feel pity for him, but I do. I do think that at 8.5 he does bare some responsibility for his behavior, but the vast majority of the blame falls on his mother.
Good God. I could not live with that. I actually feel really sorry for both of them just because that is no way to live. It may be their own fault but ugh I would not wish that kind of crap on my worst enemy.
I cannot ever make myself throw up even if I really want to and try. Like when I am sick or drunk and feel like I need to, but can't. I will sit there and try for an hour and can't do it. So I mean I guess you can train yourself to throw up, but just seems like something hard to do. Because I never was able to do it.
He really is. At this point, it's really really hard for me to look past his behavior to feel pity for him, but I do. I do think that at 8.5 he does bare some responsibility for his behavior, but the vast majority of the blame falls on his mother.
He's turned into a mini-tyrant. I hope it's not too late to redeem him.
Well, I got so much guilty enjoyment out of other people's drama on the board that I feel like it's my chance to give back!
After hurling up his meal all over the floor on Sunday night, last night he was sucking down cheese burgers and dipping artichoke in butter sauce. Hmmm.
ETA: To clarify, I had a stomach bug last Monday and Tuesday. Last Tuesday night (so, a week ago), CS threw up his pizza and Cousin was convinced it was the stomach bug. Now she's convinced that the Sunday night drama was that same stomach bug.
-- Edited by OpheliaDev1 on Wednesday 9th of April 2014 10:50:20 AM
Last night mom mentioned that Cousin was moving out in May. Dad was surprised. He doesn't know that Mom asked her to move out, and he's convinced that we're all being mean to her. He said, "Well, I guess she just got sick of it and decided to leave." He makes me so mad! Why are Cousin's feelings more important than mine and my sister's? What is so special about her that we should smile and nod while her son bully's a TODDLER and we clean up after her?!
It doesn't really impact him, though, does it? (other than his grandson being bullied which IS a puzzler that he doesn't either notice or care...)
He gets his meals and I'm guessing he doesn't clean up dishes, (or the rest of the house?) nor does he notice or care about the drain on finances. Since HE isn't affected, it isn't a problem.
Kina - you're totally right about that. He's always been this way - expected his wife and kids to suck it up, be nice, etc. I think it's very important to him to look like the "big man" and he doesn't notice or care when it's at our expense.
That's one thing I mentioned when mom and I went to our counselling appointment regarding this issue, "Why do you and Dad seem to think her moving out is some great tragedy? She's not going to starve. She won't be homeless. She's a doctor getting child support from her doctor ex husband. She will be FINE."
Kina - you're totally right about that. He's always been this way - expected his wife and kids to suck it up, be nice, etc. I think it's very important to him to look like the "big man" and he doesn't notice or care when it's at our expense.
That's one thing I mentioned when mom and I went to our counselling appointment regarding this issue, "Why do you and Dad seem to think her moving out is some great tragedy? She's not going to starve. She won't be homeless. She's a doctor getting child support from her doctor ex husband. She will be FINE."
what was her answer to that, Ophelia?
oh, and i hope your dad figures it out pretty soon. by constantly putting Cousin before you and your sister, and CS over your nephew, he's pushing the two of you away. once they can't do anything for her anymore, Cousin will forget she even knows their names, and he'll be left wondering why his children don't have much time for him.
She kind of hemmed and hawed a bit. At that point (this was in January) she really think she needed to be there to save CS and help Cousin. The last 2 months have really changed that.
My dad's seen some of the results of that, but I don't think he really "gets" it. Me and my 2 siblings have a close relationship with my mom, but not with my dad. I think it hurts him sometimes that he's not "in the loop" but honestly, I have never felt that he was "in my corner". Other people's feelings were always more important than mine.
One of his employees had a daughter my age, and she and I were at the same school in the same grade. In 8th grade, she called my "boyfriend" (we only sat together during lunch, etc), pretending to be me and asking some dumb questions. I was very upset. Dad totally didn't get why I was upset, and why I wasn't "nicer" to this girl and why we weren't BFFs. The fact that she wasn't nice to me and wasn't friendly to me just was a non issue for him. It was my job to be her friend.
